Delete

I spent the entire morning writing and deleting, first about last night's nightmare, then about my meals, then, about my nightmare again.  Then I wrote about the girl in the picture and then some bitter bile about helping people.  I am a genius.  I deleted it all.  What to do?  I'll leave today's writing to another asshole. 

What's the Use of a Title?

They don’t make it
the beautiful die in flame-
sucide pills,rat poison,rope what-
ever...
they rip their arms off,
throw themselves out of windows,
they pull their eyes out of the sockets,
reject love
reject hate
reject,reject.

they don’t make it
the beautiful can't endure,
they are butterflies
they are doves
they are sparrows,
they dont make it.

one tall shot of flame
while the old men play checkers in the park
one flame, one good flame
while the old men play checkers in the park
in the sun.

the beautiful are found in the edge of a room
crumpled into spiders and needles and silence
and we can never understand why they
left, they were so
beautiful.

they don’t make it,
the beautiful die young
and leave the ugly to their ugly lives.


lovely and brilliant: life and suicide and death
as the old men play checkers in the sun
in the park.

(Charles Bukowski)