Bare Bulb

Status report.  

My mother texted me yesterday morning to let me know my cousin had left to stay with the other cousin on the coast.  It is all on me again.  I called and asked if she wanted me to make dinner, but she said no,  "Tomorrow," she said.  When I went to see her, I asked if she would be o.k. in the house alone that night . She said yes.  It will be a test.  Today I will strip her bedsheets and put them in the washer, take her to physical therapy, go to the grocers, put the sheets in the dryer, make dinner, clean the kitchen, and put her bed back together.  That's my Friday night.  I'll see if she was o.k. overnight.  If not, I'll have to pack up my things again and stay with her.  

When I went to bed last night, I was chewing a CBD gummy and another crown came off.  I will have to call the dentist today.  Cha-ching.  

It is time for my annual physical to find out what else has gone wrong with me.  

On Monday at 8:30, I get another injection in my knee.  

I woke at three last night.  Terrible things going on in my head.  I have so many house repairs to be done.  The fence is falling down.  I have things I can't even explain.  As I lay in half-sleep, I felt my soul leave my body, just start to leave it, tired of the physical world.  "What is there to look forward to," it asked?  It just wanted out.  

Soul?  WTF?  

That is just the beginning of the shit.  

I think I need to quit drinking again.  I was reading every night rather than nodding off on the couch.  I'd lost much of my chunky belly.  I had fewer nightmares.  

A little flash can reveal the horror of the world.  Nothing looks good under a bright, naked bulb.  But that's the way the world looks to me right now.  Hence the photo.  That's just how things appear once the romance is gone.  

That's all I have.