I'm a very patriotic American, more than most. I love America (does it love me?). Maybe my relationship with the country, though, has been like my relationship with the women I've loved. Hmm. And what's the common thread there?
What I have cherished most are the American Freedoms. Freedom of the press, freedom of expression. . . . I've had the right to be a crazy fucking Boheme, march, protest, play music to raise money for radical causes. . . all protected by the U.S. military forces who I have never even barely envied. But their mission was a noble one--to protect American liberties and keep the citizenry safe from oppressors.
So what the fuck happened?
Donald Trump happened, that's what the fuck happened, him and the entire corrupt bunch of republicans kissing his ring. Now the U.S. Armed Forces are being used to deny Americans those very freedoms. It is a mission flip. And now my lack of envy is morphing into something else.
GRAPEVINE, Tex. — “We are witnessing a cultural revolution.”
Alex Clark stood center stage in a hotel ballroom on Friday evening, all business in her tweed minidress, pearls and beehive bun. The influencer and podcast host was addressing the hundreds of attendees who had gathered for the Young Women’s Leadership Summit, an annual conference hosted by MAGA youth group Turning Point USA. Perched on a pair of periwinkle platform heels, Clark laid out the tenets of that cultural revolution, one alliterative prescription at a time.
“Less Prozac, more protein!” she said. “Less burnout, more babies! Less feminism, more femininity!”
Clark, whose “Culture Apothecary” podcast for Turning Point vaulted her to the forefront of the “Make America Healthy Again” movement, was articulating her vision for a new conservative womanhood— one that fused its traditional pillars of faith and family with wellness culture.
“This is Whole Foods meets The West Wing,” she said. “It’s collagen, calluses, and conviction. It’s castor oil, Christ, and a well-stocked pantry.” The right has “the girls who lift weights, eat clean, have their hormones balanced, have their lives together,” Clark said. The left, meanwhile, has “TikTok activists with five shades of autism, panic attacks and a ring light.” All this amounted, by her calculation, to the notion that conservatives are now “the cool kids” and “mainstream.”
MAGA girls are cute, there ain't no doubt about it. Some of them. The ones in the gym married to the rich republican guys. They drive nice cars and have nice clothes, they get botox and facials and massages and have their therapists. . . .
Hold on a minute, though! These are the rock stars of MAGA, not the ones. . . you know. . . like my relatives. Lower MAGA, the majority, are the ones with jobs and mortgages and baby daddies, used cars and lots of credit card debt. They watch Dr. Pimple Popper and Honey Boo-Boo (I don't really know who that is).
But. . . they associate themselves with the upper MAGA women through commercial television and social media.
I've been suckered, I think. All the women I've loved, all those liberal democrat women. . . they all opted out for. . . marriage, children, expensive cars and clothing, big houses, husbands with lots of money. . . .
I've been a dope!
I thought I liked the bohemian girls, but they are crazy as shithouse rats, by and large, just like the MAGA media portrays them.
Remember when Fox News started hiring all the pretty women and CNN had all the. . . other. Then CNN hired Erin Burnett and put her in short skirts under a glass topped table and got a ratings jump even though she is one of the dumbest people ever to have a news show? And now? Look at the women on CNN. And I wonder. . .
Seems to me there isn't much difference in the left and right at the top. I love Caitlin Collins reporting, love how she dogs Trump, but I read an article recently, a sort of bio piece, that put her smack dab in the D.C. private club set. Can you guess how much Caitlin Collins is worth?
I should read up on Clarissa Ward, CNNs Middle East reporter. She is one of my heroes. She goes where others fear to tread and all the other cliches. She is great.
Holy shit! I just looked her up--same fucking story. Went to Yale, married to a wealthy Austrian, three kids, lots of money. . . .
And yet. . . she is nothing like a MAGA woman, is she? I don't know if I can close the circle on this one today.
Is it close or square the circle?
Look, I just needed to get away from my pathetic narrative. I'm at my mother's. Of course, this is when I get lots of party invitations. She is doing better pain-wise, but she moves slower than an arthritic turtle and really prefers to sit in a chair and let the world take care of her. I can't predict the future. I just feel I'm standing in a pool of quicksand.
Last night, I fell asleep in front of the television sometime after dinner. When I opened my eyes, my mother was going to bed. How long had I been sitting up asleep? An hour and half, perhaps. Exhausted. Somehow, though, I got hooked on YouTube videos of Sly and the Family Stone. I didn't know that the bass player and one of the keyboardists was Sly's brother and sister. It was really a family affair.
I stayed up too late then and slept poorly last night. But today, you know. . . another day in paradise.
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